Who is that person you loved talking to, but haven’t spoke to them in a long time?

I was watching a TED Talk by Celeste Headlee and she uses the phrase "prepare to be amazed." When we take the time to reach out and talk to someone, this is what happens! Communication translates unique, internal emotions into universal, external ones. It is through our words that the world feels smaller.

As technology has developed our ability to communicate has grown! Now we have SMS, eMail, and Social Media to name a few. Yet as we gained platforms, we have lost touch. Even though we can connect on multiple levels, many feel alone. In fact 3 in 5 Americans feel lonely. What if you could change that?

Today we are going to take steps to be better communicators. We will:

1. Prioritize Connection

2. Be Present

3. Follow up

Prioritize Connection

When someone says they are "terrible at staying in touch." It just means it's not their priority. That's not judgment, it's just a choice. Another choice you could make is to put an event on your calendar to reach out to someone. Not your thing? Add it to your to do list on a random day. Then, actually do it! Stop verbalizing "I should connect with X" and instead write the email, send the text, and just reach out.

One thing that's helpful is to set aside one hour a week and put it on the calendar. During that hour, send emails and texts to people with whom you want to connect.

Before you say, "but it's awkward"...it's not. In fact it may be welcome! The only way you’ll know is by starting the conversation. Now stop reading, pick an hour in the next 3 days, and schedule some connections!

Be Present

When you finally get to have that phone call with someone, actually show up for it. I don't mean pick up the phone. I mean close your laptop and don't scroll on your cell phone.

Show up.

Listen.

Listening means asking questions.

Listening means the focus is on them and not about you.

Listening means allowing the other person to feel and express without interruption.

A good conversation has a balance which means you get to share too. You might even find it helpful to share what's going on in your life!

Follow Up

After you talk to someone, and it ends with "let's not go so long before we chat again." Don't let it go so long. If someone has shared their upcoming events with you, reach out when they happen! Don't wait until you catch up with them again, shoot them a text and ask how it was. Not good at remembering? Good thing you have a calendar! Mark down their events and reach out.

People are impressed when you remember not because it is difficult, but because so few people take the time to care. When you make the choice to pay attention to someone else's life, you have no idea how impactful it may be.

Do you have your calendar out now?

Have you set aside some time to reach out to people?

When you maintain your connections with people, you have more people to cheer you on when things are good, and to help pull you up when you feel like you have lost everything.

But if you won't do this for yourself, will you do it for the 3 our 5 people who feel alone?